Children Love Lovecraft Too

While playing around on the web, I ran across this article. I thought it was really cool, so I thought I would share it here. Here is a preview of the article:


Since their original publication in the 1920s, the stories of H.P. Lovecraft have endured and grown into an entire subset of the horror genre unto themselves, with themes of the unavoidable insanity that comes with knowledge and cosmic insignificance that are far more subtle and ultimately terrifying than the average ghost story.

Which makes them great entertainment for eight year-olds.

Read More: here

Haunted Urban Legend

I did it! I got the three movies in that I needed to watch before they were taking out of Instant Watch. Really I didn't have to watch them, since I could still get them on DVD, maybe. I try to get them all watched through Instant Watch though since my DVD queue is large enough as it is. Now I have two more movies to watch before the new month. I took a break from reviewing yesterday, but I did watch a movie the day before for review. The last movie to watch was Hell House: The Book Of Samiel (2008). At work today, I managed to finish another Clive Barker book. It took me long enough, been reading it since mid February or so. I haven't decided what my next book will be yet. Until then though, I guess I will keep watching movies!

This is the plot summary that co-writer/director Jason D. Morris came up with for this movie: Before the beginning of time demons covered the darkness. After humans took possession of the earths several books came into existence. Books of knowledge with pages containing rituals and incantations. One for each of the god demons. These pages would be used to banish the dark things that lurk in the shadows. The books were passed down through the centuries among an elite sect of soothsayers. The coveted books have been sought after by the demons throughout time. Now they have discovered a way to reenter this world through portals surrounded by evil and darkness to take back what has always been theirs. The Shively house has always been a center of dark happenings throughout its existence every family that has inhabited the house has experienced a miserable and deadly end. Tonight a group of friends discover the awful truth that lay dormant in the house. The demons have possessed the former grounds keeper Adam (William Martin) to help with their escape and Theadora (Kari Wishingrad) the last in the bloodline of the soothsayers is the only one that can help stop the evil before... The demons get out.

I decided to do that just because it is more interesting than what I was going to come up with. Hell House: The Book Of Samiel is a confused movie actually. It starts off with two groups of people. One group is a four friends who end up talking about an urban legend about a father who follows his daughter and her date. He flips out when he sees his daughter sucking off her date. He kills the boyfriend, and then his own daughter. Puts the bodies next to the car and sets everything on fire. At the same time that we meet the group of friends, we also meet a news crew that is doing a story on the same legend. The story itself seems to be true, but there is also a part of it where if you park your car near where the deaths happen, something will push your car, or something like that. Anyway, between the two groups, we learn the story behind the legend.

After that, we get to watch the two reporters go back to their hotel room and start having sex. Their camera guy, who is now apparently possessed by the father from the story, kills the two lovers and sets their bodies up by the news van and sets fire to it all. The focus then shifts to the four friends. We get a little background information on Paul (Michael Anthony Carlisi), who's dad is a drunk, and Dani (Sheila Kraics), who's dad is abusive. The other two friends like to have sex a lot. At some point, the friends decide to go to the house where the father and daughter lived, which Paul has a key to the place for some reason. From there it turns into a weird movie where this guy, I assume Adam, follows the friends around and sometimes hits them with a 2x4. There is something about demons and what not, but the plot gets very muddled and confusing by then so I wasn't sure what was supposed to be going on. The book from the title and plot summary does pop up now and then, but they never make a point of telling us in the story itself what the book means. It is just there really. Theadora does flip through it, but again, it isn't explained why she is doing this.

The effects are mostly done with CGI. There are fire and other such effects, nothing all that gory at any point. The CGI effects look bad, which was no big surprise to me. The makeup to show that a person was possessed looked okay, but it was nothing that we haven't seen before. The acting was also just okay at best. Each of the actors had moments that I liked them in, and moments that they weren't so good in. I didn't hate any of the actors or their performances, but they could have been a lot better at the same time. The only two I haven't mentioned so far are Geof Libby and Jessica Marie.

It is easy to point to the editing as the main problem for Hell House. Some scenes feel too long, while others feel too short. The story itself can't seem to make up its mind what it wants to be, and gets to be all over the place when flashbacks start to pop up for no real reason and no way to know what they mean to the overall story. Even though I am pointing my finger at the editing, I don't know if it might be the director's fault in some way. Maybe he didn't film enough scenes to make it work correctly. It is just hard to say. I can't really tell any of you to go watch this movie. Since it was on Instant Watch, I don't feel my time was wasted too much, not that I had anything better to do at the time anyway. Still, I am probably being too generous with my rating. Hopefully the next two movies will be better.
2 out of 5 What kind of movie am I? I don't remember.

What A Nightmare Summer School Is

I hope I can get everything done today. If I don't get the review for today finished, I will still get a movie in since it will be off Instant Watch by tomorrow.I'm sort of babysitting. I say that because I'm not the only one here watching the little ones, but they tend to migrate towards me eventually. Because of that, it can be hard to get things done. They will be spending the night here, so at least I will be able to get the movie in once they go to sleep. Even if I have to stay up later than I should, I will do that in order to watch the movie. For today, I watched a movie called Summer School (2006). As you can see by the date of the movie, it isn't the one from 1987 with Kristie Alley in it. No, this one is more of a horror movie, which is why it appears here today.

Charles (Simon Wallace) likes to review horror movies on his web site (sounds a lot like us, no?) and has spent the last three days watching movies before summer school starts. He shows up for class early, and manages to fall asleep while waiting. Mrs. Wickham (Jennifer Prettyman) wakes him up to a class full of students. The girl he has a crush on, Lindsey (Amy Cocchiarella), is also in the same class. His two friends Steve (Tony D. Czech) and Dennis (Lance Hendrickson) are there as well because of a court order. Once he is bored, he gets out of class by saying that he needs to use the restroom. Eventually Lindsey finds him playing basketball in the gym. After they talk a while, and shoot the ball around, Lindsey leaves, with Charles leaving a few minutes later. He goes back to class finding everyone has left for some reason. Soon after he gets nailed and is knocked out. When he wakes up, he discovers that he is going to be a sacrifice to the Devil, with everyone else in the class more than willing to offer him up. Just as he dies, he wakes up, only to find himself in some other nightmare.

Summer School is interesting in the way that it is set up. In a way it is a horror anthology. Ben Trandem came up with the idea for this movie, in which a student would go through five different nightmares while in summer school. Trandem then invited some of his film school friends to come up with their own takes on horror themes. The result is five segments that are around fifteen minutes each. They all use the same cast, which is a bit different. I know the same actor has been used in each segment before, but this is the first one that I know of where the same cast was used. The five sub genres found are cult, monsters, vampire, Nazi, crazy hillbilly and slasher. I know that is six segments, but I wasn't counting the one that Trandem himself did.

It does take a while before things got interesting, for me anyway. The first couple of dreams were a little on the boring side to me, and of course I didn't realize it was just one dream after another. That is sort of where Summer School failed a bit for me. There was no in between dreams at all, it was just one after the other. I guess it would be silly for him to just keep going back to sleep but I kept waiting for some point to it all, and never got that. The later dreams got more interesting and more serious. I thought those were the better ones, but still I was looking for a connection between them all besides just dream after dream. With no connection, there ends up being no real plot to it all.

The special effects were okay. The monsters, which ended up being big spiders, looked pretty good. They had some weird movements at times, but other than that they were pretty cool looking. There isn't a whole lot of gore, even though someone dies in every segment. The acting was also just okay. Even though Lance Hendrickson was one of the directors, he isn't too bad of an actor. I guess the nice thing about having so many segments with the same crew is that they get to play different roles. Like the students would still be students but might be members of the cult or vampires, or sometimes just themselves. The only one playing himself in every dream was Charles. Simon Wallace was very good in some of them, but I found him annoying in others. The only person I haven't mentioned so far would be Ty Richardson. He was mostly found in the Nazi dream and does a good job with it.

Something that I found annoying was that with each dream, Charles would sometimes act differently. In one dream he couldn't shut up when he needed to, in another he was the one telling someone to shut up. In some dreams he would be very brave, while in others he was more of a whinny ass. It was mostly this, along with no real plot, that made me not like Summer School so much. I love the idea of all the dreams being filmed by someone different. It is a somewhat original idea for a horror movie. At one point I thought the movie was going to end on a very high note, but that wasn't the case either. Instead it went for a different ending, one I didn't care so much for. It wasn't that the ending was all that bad, I just didn't care for the dialogue that went with it. The early dreams played it pretty safe, and would probably appeal more to the younger horror fans. The later dreams get more serious though, so they appealed more to me. Summer School isn't a bad movie, but it was a near miss for me. Worth checking out if it sounds interesting at least.
2 out of 5 At least I don't die in my dreams

Death By Magic

It is time for another favorite movie. I was going to write this yesterday, but didn't realize the movie I had picked out was two hours long. I got it watched and decided to do the review today when I would have more time. As long as I get the review done, and get the next movie in, I should still be on track. Anyway, for my 850th post I decided to go with a Clive Barker favorite. Since I have been reading his books a lot lately, almost done with one of them now, I thought I would highlight one of my favorite movies based on his work. I could have gone with one of the Hellraiser movies, but I don't have any of them in my collection. One that I do though, and one I might rank with or above the Hellraiser movies anyway, is Barker's 1995 film Lord Of Illusions.

I don't recall when I first watched Lord Of Illusions, but I do remember being pulled right in by the story. It was sometime after it was released to DVD, that much I do know. The version I have is the director's cut, which I highly recommend. I don't know that I have ever watched the R rated version, but from what I understand, it was heavily edited in order to get the rating.The story was for me very different the first time I watched it. I could be wrong, but I don't recall seeing any other horror films that had to do with magic. I'm not into magic. I have never tried to learn or do a magic trick. Even so, the mix of horror and magic worked very well for me in this story.

The story for Lord Of Illusions is mostly based around Harry D'Amour, played by Scott Bakula. D'Amour has appeared in a few of Braker's novels actually, so it was nice to see someone playing the character. D'Amour is a private detective who has a past with the supernatural. It is only hinted at in the movie that he saved a boy that was reported to be possessed. A friend of his has a job that has to do with insurance fraud. Harry decides to take it, if for no other reason then to get out of New York for a while. Out in L.A., Harry finds the guy he is looking for and follows him around for a while. Things are pretty normal until Harry comes across a fortune teller that has a bunch of knives in him. After a fight with the guys that did this, Harry stays behind to listen to the guy who is still alive. Because of this, the wife of famed illusionist Phillip Swan wants to hire Harry to help protect her husband against the same people that killed the fortune teller. Harry accepts the job since it is $5,000 a day, but little does he know what he is really getting into.

Clive Barker based Lord Of Illusions off the short story The Last Illusion. A few people are surprised that Barker changed the story so much for the movie. Barker eventually decided to try and direct because he got tired of people changing his stories, yet he did it here. I guess it isn't that big of a deal this time around, since it is his story. With it being his own story, he has the right to change it any way that he feels. I would be rather ticked too if someone came in and rewrote a story that I spent a lot of time putting together as well.

I have a confession to make, one of the main reasons that I love Lord Of Illusions is because of Scott Bakula. I admit that I had a very large crush on him back in the day, and it was the main reason behind my watching this movie. I still like him, even though I have yet to watch his new show. I was surprised to discover that the future Jean Grey, Famke Janssen, was in this movie. Barker apparently knew that Famke was the person he wanted for Swan's wife as soon as he looked at her picture. Keven J. O'Connor gets the role of Swan, while Daniel von Bargen plays Nix, the bad guy of the movie.

Even though I consider Lord Of Illusions to be one of my favorite movies, it is hardly perfect. Barker gives too much away in his opening. I'm not saying it should have been cut completely out. Instead, I think it would have been better used as a flashback later on in the story. The story itself can be a little confusing. I hear the R rated version is actually worse. I also noticed that some of the special effects don't hold up. It would also have been nice if magic had played into the plot just a bit more then it did.

If you have yet to check out Lord Of Illusions, then I would be careful if I were you. From the user reviews on Netflix, it sounds like they rent out the R rated version of the film. I would hate to suggest for everyone to go out and buy it, since it isn't for everyone. Since it is in part dealing with real magic, I found it to be a very interesting movie, despite that I only watched it because of Scott Bakula.

Plagues And Prisons Just Don't Mix

I figured I needed to double up today in order to get everything watched that I want to watch in the next few days. I will need to double up tomorrow as well I think, but with one review going over to my other blog. With that in mind, after I watched and reviewed my last movie, I jumped right into The 8th Plague (2006). I have the rest of the day to get this movie reviewed though, so at least I can take my time with it a little more. One of my cats managed to get sick, so I have been trying to get her to take her meds so she can get better. So far she has been doing fine with it, and feeling better I do believe. In the mean time, I'm glad that this was a three day weekend for me. I have a little more time to get the movies in because of that! No real plans for me this weekend though.

Launa (Leslie Anne Valenza) is starting to get worried about her sister Nikki (Laura Chaves). Nikki went on a camping trip with some college friends, and none of them have been heard from. Even though it has only been two days, Launa is hell bent on going to the area where her sister was going to be camping. Her friends Crystal (Hollis McLachlan) and Gavin (Jonathan Rockett) decide to tag along with her. They eventually find the camp site, but there is no one around, so they head back into town to the police station. Since it hasn't been five days since Nikki has gone missing, the sheriff isn't willing to do anything. When Launa mentions that Nikki said something about going to Halcyon Ridge Correctional Facility, the sheriff decides to let Buck (Terry Jernigan) go with them to the prison. Buck picks up Mason (DJ Perry), a local guy that knows every inch of the county. After being warned not to read the prison walls by the local drunk, the five head in but find an evil waiting for them.

The 8th Plague is supposed to describe the evil that will overtake mankind once it is released, in case you are wondering. This is a low budget film that I ended up having mixed feelings about. Even though the plot wasn't strong, I still ended up sort of liking it. The effects helped with this some, as they were pretty good for this type of movie. There isn't much, or possibly any, character development to be found, but I think most of us are used to that when it comes to horror films. I can't really say what it was about the plot that I found so interesting. The first half hour or so goes a little slow with Launa trying to find her sister and being introduced to all of the main people. Once we get passed that, The 8th Plague becomes a little frustrating because it is so cliche. Everyone splits up once inside the prison and of course trouble finds them all quickly. Buck doesn't make a very good cop. He steps in a good sized puddle of blood and can't seem to shoot someone that isn't all that far from him. Gavin finds a bloody cell phone on the floor, but quickly forgets about it when Crystal takes her shirt off. That is a guy for you, always thinking of getting laid first and foremost! Just joking guys, I know you aren't all like that...I think. Once past this section of the film though, it isn't all that bad. The ending is a little dragged out and predictable though.

The special effects aren't anything that will blow you away, but they are actually pretty good. There is a good amount of blood to be found whenever someone gets the axe. It gets a little more gory when someones guts come out. The only effect that didn't work well is when they were trying to show brains. It was pretty obvious they just put it on top of the person's head and let it fall off from there. The acting was just okay. Leslie Anne Valenza wasn't bad in the lead role, but they didn't really give her all that much to do. The best actor I thought was DJ Perry. I enjoyed the scenes that he was in, and he isn't a bad looking guy on top of that.

The 8th Plague isn't too bad of a low budget movie, but the problems managed to out weigh the good. I was rolling my eyes one too many times for a short while there. Considering that it is only 78 minutes, it is worth a watch through Instant Watch on Netflix. I admit that I was a little surprised with the slow pace at first, mostly because of how short of a movie it is. Since it isn't really a full length film, which is 90 or more minutes to me, I thought the pace would have gone a but quicker. Despite the low rating I am about to give it, I will still suggest this one for at least one watch.
2 out of 5 Make love, not warn others of danger

Virus In Vine Form

I hate it when I start more than one side project. I barely have time to do reviews for here and Top Horror Movies Club, and then I turn around and give myself more to do. My side projects have nothing to do with movies, outside of an interview, but they do take away from watching movies. Not only am I nearing my 850th post, one more post before that time, I also discovered I have four Instant Watch movies being taken out on Wednesday. I guess I will be busy watching some movies in the next few days. By the way, if you are interested in hearing what I thought of Scream 4, please feel free to do so. For here today, I had already watched Living Hell (2008), or Organizm as it is on DVD, before I found out about the Instant Watch stuff. You can watch this movie on Instant Watch if you so wish in fact, but I have it home so watched it that way.

Frank Sears (Johnathon Schaech) is a school teacher with a somewhat bad past. His mother worked at an army base where a bio weapon was being worked on. Something happened that made her go a little crazy, tell her son to never forget that something in sub level three in vault twelve should never be bothered with. She even goes to the point of carving it into his hands so he will truly never forget. Now Frank has gotten wind that the army base is about to be demolished. He races out there, and eventually breaks in, in order to warn those that are cleaning out the place. Carrie (Erica Leerhsen) and her husband (Jason Wiles) lead a team into the vault and eventually find an area that was sealed shut. Of course they go ahead and open it all up, which lets the organism that feeds of light and energy to be released. Now it is up to Frank and Carrie to try and figure out how to beat the unbeatable.

Living Hell first found its way to the Sci-Fi channel. I'm assuming that it was filmed before it was sold to the Sci-Fi channel, and not a Sci-Fi channel original. Only reason I say that is because there is a small amount of nudity in the film that I watched on DVD. I could be wrong, but I just don't see them filming that if they know it is going to be a made for TV movie. It does have the feel of something that was made for TV though, or I guess made for the Sci-Fi channel. Their original movies are pretty well known for having some very crappy CGI work in them. Living Hell is no exception to that, but more on that later. Despite the crap CGI work, the story really isn't all that bad, at least it wasn't to me. Writer/director Richard Jefferies does manage to squeeze out some tense moments here and there. I admit that I was a little surprised by this, as I wasn't expecting much of a movie. I found myself leaning in, wondering what was going to happen next at times. Maybe I am just easy to entertain sometimes, but I did enjoy the story. There were times I had to just let something go that I didn't completely believe that could happen. The virus, or whatever it was supposed to be, could grow very quickly. The more energy it could absorb, the faster it could grow. Even bombs and bullets would make it grow faster. It could also seemingly grow in anything. Soil and rock...no problem.

As I already said, the effects were very bad looking most of the time. Even when they didn't look like crap, they still weren't all that great. The virus had a vine quality to it, as you can see in the poster art. One of the problems I had with it, besides the fact that it didn't look real at all, was that whoever did the effects didn't have them interact with the actors very well. The characters in the movie were safe from it as long as they didn't get touched by it, as soon as they did, they were infected by it. There were times when it would grow too fast and then someone would touch it as they were trying to get away, but it didn't affect them at all. This was probably because the effects person, or people, had it growing where they shouldn't have. The acting for Living Hell wasn't great either, but I was able to enjoy it a lot more than the effects.

Another thing I didn't really understand was once they found a way to fight back against this thing, they were only able to kill off small sections at first. The reason this didn't make much sense to me was mostly because it was all connected to one main source. The way they were explaining things, I would have thought that it shouldn't matter where they went to start killing it off since it was all connected. Apparently it did matter though. I am assuming this was done to fill out the movie a little more. Living Hell is hardly one of the great films out there. Considering it was picked up for the Sci-Fi channel, and knowing how bad their in house films can be, this one wasn't near as bad as those. If you can get past the piss poor special effects, you might just enjoy the plot as much as I did.
3 out of 5 I don't care if you have a cure, leave the area anyway!

Don't Trust Hungry Kids

I got a movie in Sunday, but before I could do any writing, I got called into work. I rarely work on Sunday, so this was a bit of a surprise. I knew it had to be pretty important in order to be called in. It kept me pretty busy yesterday as well, but I was able to get most everything done so I could get some writing in tonight. I learned that there are some new Ghost House Underground films out there the other day. I have already added them to my DVD queue on Netflix, but I'm thinking it will be a little while yet before I can get around to them. I have movies at home I have yet to watch, plus I have my 850th post coming up soon. While I was trying to find out how many new movies were released, I discovered that I had yet to watch one of the old releases, Offspring (2009). I set about correcting that when I discovered it was on Instant Watch.

Amy (Amy Hargreaves) and David Halbard (Andrew Elvis Miller) live in upstate Maine with their baby girl (Emma Elizabeth Messing). A friend of theirs, Claire (Ahna Tessler), who is having some marriage problems, is going to stay with them for a while, along with her son (Tommy Nelson). While they are talking and what have you, we meet George (Art Hindle), a retired police investigator. George is being called in by the police to help investigate a double murder. George is positive that it is a group of cannibals that have been around in one form or another since the 1800's. With this being a movie, you can probably guess which family is about to be attacked next.

Offspring is based on the novel of the same name by Jack Ketchum. I didn't know it at the time, but Offspring is a sequel to the novel Offseason. Since I have yet to read any of his books, this was all news to me. The film version of Offseason has yet to be made. Since the rights for the book have been sold, and it was apparently important enough for Ghost House to want a movie based on a Ketchum novel, it was decided to go after the rights for Offspring instead. Even though the movie is considered a stand-alone story, it isn't completely. While I was watching it, I kept getting the feeling that I was missing something. With it having a run time of only 78 minutes, it also felt a bit rushed at times. The back story, what of it there is, is told mostly in newspaper clippings at the start of the film. There are so many clippings, and they aren't in order all the time, that it is easy to lose interest in them. We learn that George knows of the cannibal tribe, and that he has had a run in with them before. I learned from those that have read the books, that the encounter George mentions was the first book. I also learned that the leader of the clan, or tribe (whatever you want to call it) knows George from the first book. I thought maybe she knew him, but it is never really said in the movie.

Another problem with Offspring is that the characters are never really developed much. Besides George, the only one that gets more than a brush over was Claire's husband Stephen (Erick Kastel). Ketchum and director Andrew van den Houten go out of their way to make sure that we know Stephen is a real asshole. I guess they did this so that we could look forward to the bad things that happen to him, but it doesn't work that way so much. Since I didn't care for any of the characters, it was hard to give a shit about what happened to any of them.

It wouldn't be a very good movie about cannibals if it didn't have a good amount of gore to it. Offspring doesn't disappoint there at least. Right from the opening scene things get gory. All the effects were well done. I didn't have any problems with the gore, and it even helped save the movie a little bit at least. While many call the acting bad, I didn't find it that way. It was hardly note worthy, but I still didn't find it to be bad. I ended up liking the actors that played the cannibals more for whatever reason. I guess they had to put a little more effort into it since none of them spoke English.

That is a strange thing when it comes to the cannibals. They haven't seemed to pick up on English at all, but they know to cut phone lines before attacking a place.As others have pointed out, Offspring would have worked better if the story had been told differently. Instead of using newspaper clippings to give us the back story for the cannibals, why not just have George do it? He can explain why he knows so much about them, and go into the back story at the same time. It might have even made for a longer film, and maybe I wouldn't have felt like I was missing something. The last scene of Offspring was pretty silly I thought anyway. If you watch movies for the gore, you might consider giving this one a watch. If you are into cannibal movies, you can probably do worse than Offspring. There are some things about this one I liked, but the story itself wasn't all that great to me. I will give them some extra points for putting kids and even babies in danger, and even killing some of the kids off. If you have been reading my blog long enough, you will know that is a big bonus for me.
2 out of 5 I know I forget everything else when I see food!

Killer Farmers Are Actually Funny

I'm more than ready for the weekend. For whatever reason, I haven't slept good all week. Part of it was my own fault, getting to bed a little late each night, but I have also been waking up all through the night as well. Not like I am staying awake, but it is still annoying and I don't feel like I got a good sleep in because of it. Anyway, last night I started watching The Cottage (2008), a movie out of my own collection. I am almost done with all the movies I got from the video store closing at long last. Not sure which movies I will break into after these are done. I was going to at least start the review last night, but after watching a favorite TV show that was on last night, I was ready for bed by the time the movie was over, I was ready for some sleep.

David (Andy Serkis) and his brother Peter (Reece Shearsmith) have kidnapped the daughter of a powerful man. Once they bring her inside the cottage they are hiding out in, they discover that Tracey (Jennifer Ellison) is a handful. When she comes to, Peter happens to be alone with her and gets head butted several times, breaking his nose, before David is able to help. Before long, the third person involved shows up, Tracey's brother Andrew (Steven O'Donnell). According to the plan, Andrew is supposed to bring the money that the kidnappers are asking for, but we find out that Andrew is in league with David and Peter. Two guys (Logan Wong and Jonathan Chan-Pensley), that work for Andrew's dad, follow him in order to find out what is going on. What none of them know is that a crazy farmer lives near by, and he isn't all that happy about them being around.

The Cottage lets us know right away that it is a dark comedy. Little over mid way through the movie, it starts to turn more into a horror/comedy. As I have said before, I'm not a big fan of horror/comedies. Obviously I still give them a try, and some I have actually enjoyed a lot. The Cottage starts out as more of a comedy. It did make me laugh in places, but mostly I was worried that I was wrong about this one being a horror movie. Nothing makes it a horror movie until much later in the film. Even when it does take a turn towards horror, it never loses sight of its comedic start. I actually enjoyed the second half a whole lot better. With the killer and the dark comedy, one could think of the movie Hatchet and come pretty close to the feel of the last half of The Cottage.

One thing that surprised me some was the special effects. Once the horror started, there were some pretty good gore effects to be found. Guts being spilled, a head being cut in half, even a foot cut in half. The effects are well done as well. Only once could I tell it wasn't real, but even then it wasn't bad looking. The acting was also pretty good. Jennifer Ellison isn't a bad actress, but her character eventually does start to get on one's nerves. Ellison acts out her character to make her a very tough woman. She isn't afraid to speak her mind, which more often than not involves tons of swearing, and isn't afraid to fight if she has to. Sometimes this works great and can cause some funny moments, but at the same time it can get old rather quick with all the swearing. It was interesting to see Andy Serkis in an actual role that I could see him in. The only movies I know him from are the Lord Of The Ring's. He was the person behind Gollum in those films. I thought he did a really good job in this one.

Even though I did find The Cottage to be finny in places, I never really cared much for the plot itself. It isn't a bad story, just one that I have watched many times already. I didn't care much for the first half. I think with the movie being British, I didn't always catch some of the jokes that were being thrown around. Add to some thick accents from some of the actors, it can make it hard to understand at times. I was also having a problem with hearing what was being said sometimes because of the volume being so low for that. I hate to turn up the volume in fear that a loud music cue or sound will be ten times worse. Anyway, if you are a fan of the horror/dark comedy genre, The Cottage should be just right for you.
3 out of 5 Cutting the foot in half sure looked painful!

Trespassing Is An Evil Thing To Do

Well I haven't done as well as I wanted this week. Only two reviews instead of four, but that is two more than I have been doing, so there is that. I got another movie in last night, but before I was even half way through it, I ended up going on a bike ride with a couple of friends. I was thinking a short one, since I was never much of a bike person and it has been a long time since I have been on one. That wasn't the case though. Around two hours and fifteen miles later, I got home to rest my legs. Actually it is my butt that hurts more than my legs right now. Sitting on the tiny seat for more or less two hours was a bit of a painful experience. Anyway, by the time I got home and finished watching Trespassing (2004), or Evil Remains as it was called on Instant Watch, it was pass my bedtime.

Graduate student Mark (Daniel Gillies) is doing his thesis on local mythology. Mark is interested in a myth that has come to be about a New Orleans plantation. Years ago a son killed both his parents there, so Mark is interested in why this case is so well known when you hear about cases like it somewhat often in the news, yet the houses they happen in don't become haunted like this one is supposed to be. He interviews Doctor Rosen (Kurtwood Smith), mostly because he was said to have treated the son before he killed his parents. Rosen tells Mark that back before the Civil War, the plantation was known to be a place where slaves were owned. The slaves are said to have cursed the land of the plantation so that anyone that trespasses will go crazy. Rosen doesn't believe in the curse, but does offer it up as an explanation. With Eric (Jeff Bryan Davis), Tyler (Clayne Crawford), Kristy (Estella Warren) and Sharon (Ashley Scott) in tow, Mark and company set out to the plantation, without permission to be there, to prove there is no such thing as a curse.

Trespassing starts off with showing us the killings that took place nearly twenty years ago. The son is dressed in animal hide it looks like, which can be either very weird or laughable. Since they showed this first, and talked about it several times through the rest of the movie, I think people assume that son is still alive. His body was never found, but Trespassing ends up being more than just a stalk and slash film. Even though Trespassing can become confusing at times, it tries to be more of a psychological horror film instead of a straight slasher film. There are moments where it is a slasher, but you are never sure who is doing the killing. At least you're not really supposed to know. Writer/director James Merendino has a slightly weird way to tell his story. One scene was shot three times from three different places. Eric yells at Mark and Mark answers back. Then we see this same thing again, except it is from Mark's point of view. Then again but from Tyler's point of view. I didn't get why we needed to see where each person was at during this sequence. I guess to show that each person was alone? Not that it played into the plot any really. It did add to a scene shortly later, but I still don't think we needed three versions for this. There is also a scene where we see tons of animal traps on the ground. What it had to do with anything is still a mystery, other than giving one actor a reason to limp for a while.

Trespassing isn't a gory film at all. There is some blood, and we see one person get caught in a very large animal trap, but it isn't what I would call a gory film at all. The acting was just okay. Not what I would call bad, but hardly great either. A lot of people seem to pick this one up for Estella Warren. I don't really see the why of that. I liked Ashley Scott a little more, but that is just me. Didn't care for her hair too much though. I know, silly thing to complain about, but it is true.

When I rated Trespassing on Netflix, I decided to give it three stars. But the longer I think about this movie, the less I start to like it. I still don't feel it was a real bad movie, but it could have been a whole lot better as well. The action scenes, what little of them there are, were filmed in a way that you could barely tell what was going on, if you were lucky. I got that everyone was going crazy, each at their own pace I believe, but did it have to be so confusing at times? Some more back story, to either the slaves or the family that was killed, would have been nice. There was just enough there to get the point across, which is fine, but more would have made things a bit more creepy. Not everything was bad though. There were some moments where the tension was high. I also enjoyed that the it left the story open to let us figure out if what we watched should be taken at face value or not. Trespassing isn't a complete loss, but it isn't one I would tell people they should try and watch if they get the chance either.
2 out of 5 When you know there is a lot of traps around, do your best to step in one anyway

Staying The Hell Away From Surgeons

I have been slacking with reviews a little lately. I did get two more done for Top Horror Movies Club though. Because of my reviews there, I have averaged roughly a review a day, although it sure doesn't feel that way to me. I hope to get everything turned around this week and get some reviews in for once instead of just on the weekends. I did reviews for Hatchet II and Insidious, so if you are interested in reading my thoughts on either film, just head on over to Top Horror Movies Club and check them out. Meanwhile, I have a couple of Instant Watch movies about to be taken out, so I will watch both of those, and possible do a series review as well. One of the two Instant Watch movies was Exquisite Tenderness (1995), or The Surgeon, as it is known on DVD.

Things start off in black and white. A family rushes to a doctor because something is wrong with their oldest son. The kid appears to pass away, which leads to the parents leaving the doctor's house. While little brother watching through the slightly open door, he sees his brother come back to life, only to then see the doctor kill the boy. Now in present day, which they don't say how many years has passed, we meet Doctor Theresa McCann (Isabel Glasser). Theresa seems to not like Doctor Stein (Malcolm McDowell) because of some experimental surgery that he does. Theresa gets herself into a bit of trouble when she goes over Stein's head and sends one of his patients to a dialysis machine. A doctor shows up in full surgery gear, even with the mask on, and injects the patient with something that kills her. Since no one noticed this, and of course they didn't think it was strange that a doctor was walking around with a mask on, Theresa gets the blame for it. Of course they don't know that the kid from the start of the movie is now going around killing people, but why is he? And what is his link to Theresa?

Exquisite Tenderness, I have no idea why they picked that title, turned out to be a bit more of a thriller instead of a horror movie. It does have moments that could easily be put in a straight horror movie though. Most of the movie takes place in one hospital. There are a few scenes that take place outside of it, which mainly involve Theresa. There is a bit of a love story between Theresa and Doctor Hendricks (James Remar). I didn't mind this too much, since it feels more like filler more then anything else. It does play into the plot a little bit. I was getting annoyed with Theresa always asking Hendricks medical questions though. She is a doctor after all. Maybe she was just getting his opinion or something, but they just made it seem like when those two were around each other, Theresa forgot everything she knows.

Even though the connection between what happened at the start of the movie, and how the guy becomes what he is, is explained...I still didn't really get it. I guess in the end it doesn't really matter. After all it shouldn't matter why a person is going around killing people, he or she just is. There was actually a reason why he was killing people in Exquisite Tenderness, not sure if it made a lot of sense, but it sounded good in a way. The only thing that bugged me about the killer was that he was using the vents to get around. I'm not saying that it would be impossible to do that, but when you have an entire hospital staff and cops looking for you, I would think it would be very hard to stay quiet while moving around in them. It also ended up leading to one too many shots of the guy falling out of the ceiling onto someone.

Exquisite Tenderness was surprisingly gory. It was hardly a blood bath of a movie, but it would throw in enough gore to mix things up now and then. The best one was the death at the dialysis machine. That looked very painful, and the effect was very well done. Since it takes place in a hospital, you can expect a lot of needles, stabbings and since the police are involved at times, shootings. The acting wasn't too bad. I thought the leads were fine, but not great. Even though this is a joint USA/UK/German film, it was filmed in Canada. It was interesting to see James Remar, Peter Boyle and Malcolm McDowell all in the same film, even if some didn't have the biggest roles.

I can't call Exquisite Tenderness a great film by any means. It was a bit slow in places and the plot wasn't always all that exciting. The gore made up for things, and even the crazy doctor was fun to watch at times as well. There is some nudity to be found, not all of it good, but the bad was meant to be that way. I only really bring this up because it is a rare film that had some male nudity in it. Exquisite Tenderness was worth a watch, but I can't say that I would go out of my way to watch it again. It isn't a bad film, just an okay one.
3 out of 5 Glad I don't have a fear of needles

Zombies Invade Buffalo

For those that follow my blog, and read the comments, you probably know Cattleworks, or at least know of him. We keep in touch outside of the blog world by sending an email to each other now and then. Lately I have been trying to get back to being a low budget friendly blog by trying to do something more than just watching and reviewing the movies. I haven't done an interview in a long time, so I decided it was time to get back to that. The people I have tried to contact though has yet to write me back, so I can only assume they aren't interested. That changed a little bit when Cattleworks told me he wanted to send the movie The Final Night And Day (2011). This is a movie he has been telling me about in emails because he worked on the movie. As fate would have it, this was the same way that I first started getting into doing interviews. Cattleworks sent a movie that he was in for me to review and I got some interviews from there. So hopefully I will have an interview or two on the way before long.

The Final Night And Day starts off shortly after a bus has crashed. The bus was transferring a group of convicts to a different prison with four guards before the crash. Now one of the guards is laying dead on the street after going through the front windshield. Not having much of a choice, the three remaining guards decide that their best option is to find the nearest town with the inmates in tow. Marshal (Richard Satterwhite) first has to track down Clay (Terry Kimmel, a.k.a Cattleworks), as Clay makes a break for it. Once they get Clay back, and get everyone moving, they soon realize that things have changed when they start coming across zombies. Will they be able to work together to get to the lake like they plan?

The Final Night And Day was filmed entirely in the Buffalo, NY area. With all the people that showed up to become a zombie that it became the largest indy movie to be filmed in the area. Directors Stephanie Andrews and Adam R. Steigert make the most of their zombies. They give a real sense that the area has been over run by zombies at times. There is also a wide variety of zombies that can be found as well. I liked that a lot as it gave it more of a feel that things went bad in a hurry. My favorite zombies had to be the little kids. You just don't see many kid zombies in horror films. It is like they just disappeared instead of becoming zombies. Some problems do show up though. Like many low budget films that I have watched, there is sometimes a sound problem in The Final Night And Day. It can be hard to hear what people are saying some of the time. All gun shots seemed to sound the same as well. I also noticed that there were times when there was a build up of something about to happen, that ends up going nowhere. The best example of this was towards the start of the movie when they show that the bus has caught fire. None of the guards or inmates seems to notice this, so I thought it might lead to something. Everyone manages to walk away without anything happening though. This was a minor thing really, but it was something that I was able to notice.

The effects are both good and so-so. I was really impressed with how the zombies looked. I didn't see one that I thought the makeup was bad for. The gore shots were also well done. There were a couple of times that the zombies got to tear into someone. The only effects I didn't like were the CGI shots. I could be wrong, but I do believe every time someone was shot, it was done using CGI. Fire and smoke would also often show up as CGI. For burning buildings I could understand a bit. After all, I don't think someone would allow their place to be set on fire for a low budget film. The acting also had its share of ups and downs. I can't complain all that much about it though. For it being made of mostly (or all?) local actors, they didn't do that bad of a job. I could have the wrong actor here, but I believe it was Christopher Brechtel who reminded me a lot of Will Ferrell. Anyway, nice job by all involved with the main roles.

Another thing that bugged me some was that a bunch of people holed up in the local high school. I was fine with that, but they seemed to have a leader that was a little messed in the head, and everyone seemed fine with following him. It just seemed strange to me that so soon after the zombie outbreak, which I believe was only three days at most, a good sized group would already be organized. Don't get me wrong, it made a good plot point, but it just seemed to happen a little too fast. The Final Night And Day clocks in at just over an hour. This helps the pace of the movie a lot, and only slows down a little bit to throw in a some character development. If you like zombie movies, I am pretty sure you will like The Final Night And Day. Sure it could have been better, but I can say that for a lot of movies out there. Despite the problems, which many were just minor, I still found this to be a fun movie. It is out on DVD so be on the look out for it!
3 out of 5 I would have shot the kid zombies first

Exploring The World Of Hungry

I feel I have watched my fair share of horror movies from outside of the United States. Now and then I will get to watch a movie for the first time from a certain country. In this case, with Taxidermia (2006), said country was Hungry. Right after I finished my last review, I jumped into this movie, and then went to the theater to watch yet another movie. I don't know what has gotten me into such a movie watching mood lately, but I am hardly complaining about it. Part of it, for the theater anyway, is that I discovered the rewards program my credit card offers has gift cards for AMC theaters. I have already used up one of the two that I got. I decided to pay for the ticket with money out of my pocket, and use the gift cards for popcorn and drink. I will have to get some more of those when I can.

Taxidermia is a hard movie to describe the plot for because there is much of one to be honest. The movie follows three generations of men. Those from Hungry say that the film is broken up into three sections: before Communism, during, and after. Each generation that we follow represents their period in history. Things start off during World War II with Morosgoványi Vendel (Csaba Czene), a solider who is more of a servant to his superior officer then being an actual solider. He also thinks about sex a whole lot. Once that story is told, we then meet Balatony Kálmán (Gergely Trócsányi), a professional speed eater during the Soviet occupation of Hungry. The last story is about Balatony Lajoska (Marc Bischoff), a taxidermist after the occupation.

Each story line has its own plot running through it, but very little of it is connected with the other stories. Vendel has a kid who is Kálmán, who then has a kid that is Lajoska. Vendel doesn't make it into the second story but Kálmán makes it into the third story. Those that know the history of Hungry explain this as the old Hungry, Vendel, dies when the Soviets occupy Hungry. Then much later, the new generation, Lajoska, is left to deal with the remnants of the occupation, Kálmán. They say that writer/director György Pálfi does a great job of showing this without actually saying it. This is all well and good, but is completely lost on someone like me that knows nothing about the history of Hungry. If it wasn't for reading up on Taxidermia after watching it, I still wouldn't know any of this.

I think for most of us, that have no clue about the history of Hungry, Taxidermia will likely be remembered by all the gross images that are found through the movie. From a pig being slaughtered, to a bird taking a shit, things can get pretty gross at times. One thing that always gets to me in a movie or seeing it in person, is watching someone throwing up. In the second story, there is a whole lot of that going on. After they would eat as much as they could, they would then go throw it back up. I guess to make room for the next round. I had no idea that speed eating was ever so popular as it is shown here though. In the last story, which is the only one that seems to have anything to do with the title of the movie, we watch Lajoska work on a human fetus, and prepare an adult human body for his art, which you can see the result of in the poster, sort of.

I can't call Taxidermia a bad film, even if I didn't really know what the hell was going on at times. The pacing could be a little slow at times, so I can see some people not liking it because of that. The special effects and the acting were both good. While I can't say that there a lot of special effects, it will still keep people happy that are into that. From a horror movie stand point it is hard to tell all of you to watch this movie. I don't really see it as a horror movie, but those that know their history will gladly argue that point with me. Maybe it is to them, but not as we see horror movies I don't think. One last thing I would like to mention about Taxidermia is the only movie I can think of where the male nudity is shown way more than female nudity. Both are there, but the male nudity is shown more often. In most American movies, female nudity is shown without much of a problem, but male nudity is shown very quickly, if at all. The opposite can be said here. It is the female nudity that is either only glimpsed or not shown at all. Taxidermai was interesting to say the least. Is it worth a watch though? I will leave that up to all of you.
3 out of 5 I sure wouldn't want fire near my private areas

Enjoying The Wilderness

Sorry I haven't been posting anything lately. I have been watching movies, but they haven't been horror movies for once. While at the convention, I did watch Absentia. This was a movie I thought was very cool, so please check out the review for it. Over the week I have watched the not so good Unspeakable, to the so-so Sucker Punch (to my disappointment), to the also so-so Battle: Los Angeles. I also watched Wilderness (2006) because it was about to be taken out of my Instant Watch queue. Something I don't get at all about it though. The last day to watch it was March 31st, which I did. So it was taken out on April 1st. I forgot to delete it out of my queues, as I also had it in my DVD one, and noticed it would be back on Instant Watch April 2nd. What is the point of taking it out for one day?

A group of boys in a juvenile hall are always picking on Dave (John Travers). They pick on him so much that one night Dave decides to cut open his wrists and bleeds to death in his bunk right next to everyone else. No one notices this until the next day. It is decided that as punishment, the group of boys will be sent off to an island with Jed (Sean Pertwee) to watch over them. They are supposed to bond and whatever else while there. While the place is supposed to be uninhabited, they soon discover that a couple of girls are also on the island with their adult supervisor Louise (Alex Reid). Jed and Louise decide that it would be best if they kept their two groups apart, just in case some of them decide to hook up. Of course, some of them do anyway. The next day Jed decides to send the boys off to do some tasks. A couple of the boys find an older man on the island, and then later we see the guy is very dead. Jed thinks one of his boys did it, but Louise finds what she thinks is bite marks on the guy's neck. The next day after this, things go from bad to worse when they all realize there is someone that is willing to hunt each of them down.

The Wilderness is a movie that is from the UK, and was filmed in Ireland. It is also from the same director of Deathwatch, Michael J. Bassett, which I loved. While watching Wilderness, I started to realize that I wasn't liking it as much. The story was interesting, but I had to wonder whoever was hunting these kids down even knew where they would be. Writer Dario Poloni does take the time to explain this, even if it does come in right towards the end. I guess what bothered me the most though was why these kids would be allowed to go anywhere. At least some of the kids have committed are serious crimes like murder and rape. Not things you would send a bunch of them off with one adult and expect that one adult to live long or at least not get hurt. To their credit at least, the kids (I guess I shouldn't call them kids, more like teenagers/young adults) do behave themselves for the most part until the shit hits the fan. The cat and mouse game was just okay to me in this movie. There would be times when one of the haunted would be alone and walk away from an area, only to discover the hunter was near by the whole time. Made me wonder why the hunter didn't just take out the pray right then. Some of the traps that the hunter set up were interesting at least.

To my surprise, Wilderness is a fairly gory film. There are some dog attacks that get very bloody, and at least once, very gory. From being gutted by a dog, to having to tear ones own leg off, it should make most gore hound fans happy. The effects are well done as well. The actors were mostly unknown, at least to me, but I was still happy with the acting. It wasn't always the best, but it was never real bad. You will find Toby Kebbell, Stephen Wight, Luke Neal, Ben McKay, Lenora Crichlow, Karly Greene, Adam Deacon, Richie Campbell and Stephen Don.

Wilderness doesn't try to hide the reason, or even who is doing the hunting. The reasoning for the hunter killing everyone is a little flawed, after all Dave wasn't an angel either even if he did get picked on. The fact that the killer is using dogs to do some of his work was a neat way to change things up. Another thing that bugged me some is that when the hunter decided to make things personal at last, the dogs simply disappear for the rest of the movie. I never felt that Wilderness was a bad movie. I never enjoyed it as much as I did Deathwatch, but then they are completely different sub genres. While Wilderness isn't really a stalk and slash type movie, it is at its heart. If you enjoy these types of movies, you won't go wrong with this one.
3 out of 5 Still don't get why the killer sometimes waits to make the kill